Tuesday, February 24, 2015

Temptations Only Mothers Know


In an effort to lighten my otherwise stressful week, I'd like to get back to blogging. Today, I introduce to you what I hope will be a week-long series I'd like to call:

TEMPTATIONS ONLY MOTHERS KNOW

Truthfully, these will most likely be temptations that only mothers of small children in America know, but hey--that title just seemed far too wordy.  "You get what you get and you don't get upset," as my son's kindergarten teacher used to say.  But, enough with the chit-chat.  Let's get down to business.

Temptation #1: Adding that bucket of dirty bibs to the washer load of underwear and socks.

Okay, this may be a temptation that only I struggle with.  I'm willing to guess it's not an across-the-board struggle of all American young moms, but it's definitely a struggle at my house.  Every. Single. Time. I put in a load of underwear and socks I want to dump in that bucket of dirty bibs and towels that have collected from the kitchen.  But you know what happens every. single. time. I give in?

Velcro.  Velcro happens.

Ever experienced velcro on elastic? No? You're not a mom with a small child in bibs, you say?  Lucky you, I say.

Bibs.  Such a love/hate relationship I have with these things.  Snaps you say, snaps! Yes, I know.... snaps don't get caught on everything and ruin your perfectly nice underwear.  Snaps make that wonderful little (you guessed it) SNAP sound when push them together and they are near impossible for the child to take off.  Snaps.  But of the approximately 40 bibs that we own, only about 3 have snaps.  Yes, I could make my own (in fact, I have an Etsy business where I do just that), but why make new bibs when you already HAVE 40 bibs?  I'm all about using what you have.  Even if I have material to make something new without buying it, WHY make something new?!  People are way too used to throwing out what they don't like and replacing it with something they'll only like a little more.  But let's not get off on a tangent here.  The point is, VELCRO.

I like to be as efficient as I can with laundry since there are six of us in this family. (And when one is potty training, isn't that more like three people??)  That means when a load of dirty things is going on the hot cycle and it's not full, my basic instinct is to add whatever else I can.  That bucket.... that bucket that I always keep in the kitchen to toss dirty bibs and towels and washclothes in... that bucket sitting there ready to be cleaned and put back in the cabinets....

Just. Say. No.

I learned that phrase in the D.A.R.E. program in elementary school, and yet it's still so applicable today.  Just say no.  Just don't do it.  You know what will happen.  All that nice velcro is going to fall in love with all that lovely elastic in the underwear and next thing you know you'll be spending twenty  minutes painstakingly pulling each "hook" of those doggone hook and loop closures off your once-unfrayed underwear.

Ladies and Gentleman, I want you to know that tonight I said no.  Tonight, I did not give in.  May there be many more nights like this one, for the sake of my will power and the longevity of our underwear.

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