Christians and Life: On the Topic of Abortion...

My heart has been breaking lately, seeing articles like this one about Kermit Gosnell's trial...the grotesque images of what happened in his clinic in Philadelphia...  My mind has been on those tiny hands and feet of each of those lives he cut off from this world.

This won't be a long post, but I just wanted to share a question... Something my mind has been pondering for a long time, and perhaps something you should be asking too.  Yes, those of us who are "pro-life", we are waging war, but I wonder if we haven't had something to do with how far this war has come.

This question is for Christians--those people claiming to follow Christ, to live as he lived and who are called to seek his will.

Has this war come to such a front because we have lost the value of life?  

Oh yes, we quote our Scripture that talks about its holiness and uniqueness.  I do not mean to say that we don't know what our faith teaches.  We do know.  And His Spirit in us reminds us of the preciousness of our own life and those of others...

But our lives are busy.  Cluttered.  We are consumed with bettering our selves and our children.  Consumed with the newest fads and latest technology.  We have more to think about and do than ever before.  Our lives are like a whirlwind blowing from one locale to the next.

Is it right for us to live in America and preach our choice--our choice to live in what manner we want, and yet to point fingers at others and tell them that in this particular area, they can't?  They can prioritize choice in anything they want, except this.  In all other ways, god is self.  But in this one, no, our God says "don't kill the babies."

Yes, I am pointing the finger at you.  And me.  All of us.  We write, we talk, we live day to day going from one choice to the next.  I'd wager a guess that more of our Facebook statuses are about the choices we've made, will make, or are unsure about making, than we do about how highly we value our lives.

We've done it.  We, too, have accepted the lie that choice is King.  We cannot fight the battle of abortion on choice.  We do not choose when life starts.  God already did.  We cannot choose if it's important. God has already made it so.

Our battle is in the value.  But it's no surprise the war has gotten as far as it has, because we have been confused... we have thought it was of choice.

What if we started to live like we really valued life?  Ours.  Theirs.  Everyone's.  What if I valued life itself, this gift--this amazing thing that God has given that enables me to live and move and have my being--higher than I value choice.  I wonder how this war would change.  I wonder if eyes that were blind would see.  I wonder if we would change, and let go of our hold on choice as King, and let our Savior reign instead--breathing in joy and thankfulness for the simple things--of life and love, and of the true JOY it can bring when we savor it.

In essence:  We won't show them God by telling them what the Bible says.  We will show them how God values life when we value it.  1 John 3:18, "let us love not with words or speech but with actions and in truth."

A snowy winter day

This morning we went out and got our customary milk and bread before the snow.  Well, we actually went out for a whole list of things, of which bread and milk were a part.  But it seemed fitting to mention we had gotten those typical staples, as a storm was indeed on the horizon.

It started snowing after lunch and has been snowing since.  I've tried to get outside as much as possible lately, but with the freezing weather, we never seem to be out more than half an hour tops.  It's made for mighty cabin fever around here.

I noticed the other day that we've accumulated a large array of plastic containers for storing left overs.  It seems that I've kept every useable container, and now my plastic drawer is overflowing.  We do recycle, and I could very well simply recycle many of these containers.  But, I thought--before we recycle them, maybe we can get a little crafting use out of them...

So, on this snowy day, we started with craft #1 using the plastic containers.

Hats.

And, since I am a big fan of Amazon.com, I have lots of cardboard to spare.  Making a hat didn't take any out-of-the-ordinary supplies at all.

Here's a preview of my first idea on how to use those left over containers :)  (Well, maybe I should call it my second?  Since I used one of them last year as the face of Thomas the Tank engine in my oldest son's Valentine box as shown here.)

Chaos All Around

I was told last week that I need to be writing in my blog more often.  Seems to be that in hard times I hide away like a tortoise in his shell, but it's in the happy times that I sing out like a bird.  Right now, these, are hard times, and the silence of my blog is testament to that fact.

I've been thinking a lot today about the "problem of evil" and of grace and of mercy... of God's plan and provision... of His sovereignty and love...  Far too many thoughts to write here, and they would be anything but coherent, I'm sure...  but, have you ever heard Sara Groves' song "Why it Matters"?

Sit with me and tell me once again
Of the story that's been told us
Of the power that will hold us
Of the beauty, of the beauty
Why it matters

Speak to me until I understand
Why our thinking and creating
Why our efforts of narrating
About the beauty, of the beauty
And why it matters

Like the statue in the park
Of this war torn town
And it's protest of the darkness
And the chaos all around
With its beauty, how it matters
How it matters

Show me the love that never fails
The compassion and attention
Midst confusion and dissention
Like small ramparts for the soul

How it matters

Like a single cup of water
How it matters

(listen to it here)

I was thinking of it tonight.  How lovely it is, and how true.  I am learning more about the beauty in the darkness, grace in the midst of chaos.

In the midst of pondering these hard things, a thought popped into my mind.  Perhaps not so much a thought as a picture... a picture of chaos--of chaos, but of joy and grace as well.

Do you see it?  My eldest there in the forefront acting as if there's nothing going on inches behind him, as he tries hard to show off his toy and snazzy looks to the camera?  And then there's the two younger in the background, vying for space, wrestling, fighting with no concern being in the picture at all.  Do you see it?  The chaos?  And the beauty?  The hilarity of it all?

Okay, so my troubles (and yours) are not so light and funny as my children's antics in front of the camera.  But, truly--do you see it?  The connection of darkness to light?  That there is no mercy without despair?  No grace without challenge?

Craft Therapy

I will admit that I am prone to anxiety.  And when there is a lot to be anxious about, I can easily slide into depression.  Years ago, after birthing my first son, I realized that unless I stopped the cycle, real damage could be done that would effect my whole family.  Now, I try to recognize the signs and do whatever I can to keep from sliding down that slope.

Lately, with all the hardships in my life, I have been tempted to hide away and wallow.  I'm thankful for a Spirit that reminds me that this is not the way to healing.  And while Bible reading and prayer is a wonderful tool for encouragement and right-thinking, I also find that I need a mission or focus when I find I have a lot of time on my hands.

Last night, as my husband sat working and my children were all in bed, I knew there was a lot of housework that could be done.  Of course, on the list of priorities, wallowing is higher than housework on any day.  And while Facebook can be a great way to catch up on other people's lives, it does nothing for my mood.  If anything, it's just a tool for coveting and jealousy when I'm already in a foul frame of mind.  I needed a focus.  I needed a project.  I needed some distraction.

So, to Pinterest I went.

I didn't have to scroll much to find a whole bunch of people were pinning this super cute baby carrier for a toddler.  I was like, "man, that's super cute.  My daughter would love that!"  I'm not so great at doing things well, but I am good at seeing something and making a basic copy.  Mine is never as good as the original.  But I know my intentions are this: to make what I want in as little time as I can and have it function for as long as I think the owner (of the thing) will use it.   So, in less than an hour, I had come up with my own version of a baby carrier, based on that super cute one mentioned above.

Using old clothes that had stains and holes, I put together my daughter's new favorite toy.  Of course, at this point in her life, she much prefers stuffed animals to dolls, and the animals don't quite fill out the carrier correctly.  But that's okay.  We made do.  I actually put a child-sized scarf in the bottom pocket so her favorite stuffed turtle could poke it's head through instead of sitting way at the bottom with it's feet hanging out. :)  And that pocket on the front?  Actually a piece of a dress that had stains on it and was unraveling.  The top with the ruffles was part of the bodice of the dress.  Yep.

Well, I have to say I'm pretty excited about my project.  Not only did it do the trick of distracting me from my foul mood, but (and even better), now my daughter is ALL SMILES!  And what's better than seeing your two year old light up a room with her joy?  Not much.

Oh Dear What Can the Matter Be

My father recently started treatments for lung cancer, so I, along with my three small children, took the trek across three states to come help out.  I may be a bit hindered with all my groupies, but I can still be of some help in the midst of all that needs to be done.

I've been here almost a week and it seems like a whirlwind.  So much has been done.  So many things still on the to-do list.  Today, the exhaustion was catching up to me.  I decided to "take a break" and just stay at my mom's house with my three kids...

I was busy making knots for my pumpkin knot rolls (recipe), when I realized how very far removed the kitchen was from the various play-areas throughout the house.  I decided that if I were ever in the market for a new home, I would assuredly *not* get a set-up like this.  I mean, who knows what could happen while I'm in the kitchen and the children are elsewhere?

I am not lying when I tell you I had these thoughts.  You will think that I am when I tell you what happened next...

After such thoughts of my potentially-trouble-making children, I realized that they were indeed silent at that moment.  Silence, with kids the age of my children, is never a good sign.  I went in search of them and found my two older ones (ages 5 and 2), playing downtairs...laughing.  Hmph.  Not normal.  But, I was tired.  And in the middle of something. At that very moment, it seemed like a fine idea to leave them be.

About ten minutes later, they came running up, still chuckling to each other, and started running around.  Wow.  Seems like this day of rest must have been good for them too.  What a blessing.

Then my two year old daughter came up to my one year old son, grabbing his hair to a pair of scissors, and said, "I'm going to cut your hair!"  I wheeled around in a heartbeat and said, "noooooooo way!  We never cut our brother's hair!"

Shocked, my daughter looked at me, let go of her brother's hair, and quickly threw the scissors to the floor.  But there was something wrong.  Something very wrong.  With HER hair.

Yesterday, my daughter looked like this:

Adorable, right?  I know.  Sometimes  I just look at her and think about how absolutely adorable she is.  Especially those eyes....and that hair...!  Oh, what wonderful hair.

Yesterday her hair was beautiful.  Today, her older brother took her to the salon.  And I only wish I could glue this back on without anyone knowing any different....

I think I'm in mourning.  My adorable daughter is no longer so adorable.  I'm wondering if there's any way I can get her to wear a hat for the next four months until the hair at the top of her head grows back.  This is going to take a considerable amount of creativity.  And you can bet I won't be sleeping much tonight--I'll be too busy hoping when I wake up, this was all just a bad dream.

Sleep Eating

It's about time for a funny post!  

My youngest son went for his 15 month check up a few weeks ago.  We were at the doctor's office for hours, and everyone came home exhausted.  I knew my son was tired, but  I figured he must be hungry too.  I thought it'd probably be a good idea to feed him at least a little something before taking him up to his crib.  I put a blueberry-banana muffin on his tray.

He grabbed the muffin.

Squished it in his face, double-handed.

And then.....

fell asleep.

With hands, and muffin, still pressed against his face.


But the best part?  It's like he was dreaming of eating.... so he was still chomping down on his muffin while thoroughly asleep!  You could even see his eyes moving as if he's in REM sleep!





It was hilarious.  I stood there for a minute just laughing.  And then I did the only thing a parent can do in these types of situations... I got out the camera.

On Loss

If you are squeamish or generally uninterested in reading about the personal and medical matters of another's life, you best stop here.  I have plenty of other interesting, not-so-personal posts that will mostly likely suit you.  But today, I'm getting a little deep....

This was a hard week for me.  A week of confusion, uncertainty, disappointment, and ultimately loss.  My husband and I have three beautiful, young children, and at this time last week, I was pregnant with number four.  At least, I thought I was pregnant with number four.  I could hardly believe that I had kept the secret so long, since I have such a *huge* mouth.  Anyone who knows me well knows that I talk about anything with anyone.  So the fact that I was 10+ weeks along and hadn't told more than a handful of people was quite an accomplishment.  I couldn't wait to see my family in a few weeks and tell them the news--they'd be shocked that I was almost three months along and they hadn't even known!!

But then there was spotting.... and then a doctor's appointment without hearing any baby heartbeat... and then an ultrasound with only a six week sac... and then blood levels that showed my pregnancy hormones dropping... Days later the actual process of miscarrying begun, and the blood flow and pain was more than I ever anticipated.  As if knowing you lost your precious baby wasn't bad enough, then you had to actually get all of that nonviable pregnancy out of your body--not an easy thing to do, especially at 11 weeks along.  My heart breaks even more now to think of women who are even in their second and third trimester and lose their babies.  I think I'd probably become a hermit for a *long* while until I could deal with all that pain and loss.

"Blighted Ovum"--first time I heard the phrase and it's certainly taken over my week.  There was an afternoon and evening where there was still hope it wasn't a blighted ovum, just that I was much further behind in my pregnancy than expected.  But blood tests the next day confirmed it.  So many emotions.  So much confusion.  I thought I was going to be okay with it, but then the actual process started to happen.  Back at the hospital, I decided this wasn't so easy after all.

I will always remember this week.  And I am so thankful for my friends who have been there when I needed them--to listen to my heartache, to take my kids at a moments notice, and to bring me dinner when I could hardly stand up.  In this time, I am finding hope in a God who is good, who has planned good for me since the beginning of time, and in whom I can always put my trust.  May this Scripture give you encouragement in whatever trials you face, just as it has brought me encouragement in mine.

Isaiah 55

“Come, all you who are thirsty,
    come to the waters;
and you who have no money,
    come, buy and eat!
Come, buy wine and milk
    without money and without cost.
² Why spend money on what is not bread,
    and your labor on what does not satisfy?
Listen, listen to me, and eat what is good,
    and you will delight in the richest of fare.
³ Give ear and come to me;
    listen, that you may live.
I will make an everlasting covenant with you,
    my faithful love promised to David.
⁴ See, I have made him a witness to the peoples,
    a ruler and commander of the peoples.
⁵ Surely you will summon nations you know not,
    and nations you do not know will come running to you,
because of the Lord your God,
    the Holy One of Israel,
    for he has endowed you with splendor.”

⁶ Seek the Lord while he may be found;
    call on him while he is near.
⁷ Let the wicked forsake their ways
    and the unrighteous their thoughts.
Let them turn to the Lord, and he will have mercy on them,
    and to our God, for he will freely pardon.

⁸ “For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
    neither are your ways my ways,”
declares the Lord.
⁹ “As the heavens are higher than the earth,
    so are my ways higher than your ways
    and my thoughts than your thoughts.
¹⁰ As the rain and the snow
    come down from heaven,
and do not return to it
    without watering the earth
and making it bud and flourish,
    so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater,
¹¹ so is my word that goes out from my mouth:
    It will not return to me empty,
but will accomplish what I desire
    and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.
¹² You will go out in joy
    and be led forth in peace;
the mountains and hills
    will burst into song before you,
and all the trees of the field
    will clap their hands.
¹³ Instead of the thornbush will grow the juniper,
    and instead of briers the myrtle will grow.
This will be for the Lord’s renown,
    for an everlasting sign,
    that will endure forever.”

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